It’s hard – maybe impossible – to want the best for someone and yet let them experience life for themselves.
My daughter just ran for Vice President of 7th grade. I was super proud of her for putting herself out there. Problem was I found myself really wanting her to win.
I tried not to… I picked her up with a celebratory donut and a small succulent on the day her campaign was over. They hadn’t voted yet, and I wanted her to know the most important thing was that she’d run an honest and positive campaign, and that she’d done her best – not whether she won or not.
But honestly, I was having a hard time believing that. I wanted her to have the experience this early in life that when we take risks, it can pay off. I even stopped by the office one day to find out what happened because I couldn’t wait (they didn’t know and I felt ridiculous).
Well, as she told me later, she won! She’s going to be the Vice President of her class next year. I’m happy for her, and I know she has her work cut out for her.
As do I. Each day, I try to let her walk her own path, without constantly adding in my own perspective and desires onto her experiences. It’s hard – maybe impossible – to want the best for someone and yet let them experience life for themselves.
One thing that’s been helping me lately is the concept of Empty Presence. In the morning right after I wake up, I sit and do some conscious breathing. I empty out with each exhale, and invite in receptivity and spaciousness with each inhale.
Breathing this way helps me start the day with less assumptions and expectations, and prepares me to take in all the beauty that awaits.
This summer, I hope you get to enjoy many moments of being with your loved ones just as they are – and yourself too, just as you are.
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